The Magic of Middle School

I recently attended a book talk, “Finding the Magic in Middle School” by Chris Balme, who I consider the “Dr. Becky” (Becky Kennedy) of Good Inside (book and parenting platform – I read and joined), for middle school kids.  Side note: what an apt last name; he is certainly a balm for the childhood wounds that we all have and hold inside. 

The takeaways resonated with me (questions kids are asking themselves are: how am I, how do I connect, and what will I contribute), and really made me think about my own middle school years, which are a bit fuzzy. What I do remember is that it was a difficult transition, and I felt scared, alone and lost most of the time – apparently that is common, so it was comforting to know I wasn’t really alone. This was most felt during his presentation and the collective ahhhhs, sighs, deep breaths, and nodding from parents in the audience.

The reason for this post is to share that you also are not alone, that just about every new phase in life will have some element of uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure–the general definition of vulnerability (Brene Brown), which is a prerequisite for living a wholehearted life. And is the foundation of growth and true belonging.  I’m trying to put some of my new learnings into practice, to truly see J&J as they are, reflect back to them who I see, support and be with them along their journeys, and help teach them skills they need to navigate life (tbh, while also learning the skills myself at the same time; the metaphor (?) that I’m living in life and work is “I’m flying the plane while building it, too” — scary or just living life? I think/hope it’s both.

Jess is kind, has a quiet demeanor, and in the most unexpected moments, comes up with the best zingers in her most deadpan voice. She safeguards her energy and is finding/practicing her voice – sharing her likes (reading, slime, dogs) and dislikes (forced interaction with other kids), and is figuring out friendships.

Jonah is fun, expressive and has strong emotions from his big heart that’s full of love, compassion, and also some of the less positive emotions 🙂 He remains playful, energetic, and passionate – when he finds “the thing” he likes, he is 100% in, whether it’s fishing (starting from age 4!) or soccer, which started last year.

Both kids are fun, funny, and keep us silly, happy, learning and (re)discovering ourselves, and it has been and will be the greatest honor of my life being their mom. The middle years are just around the corner, and while I’ve yet to read the book and the jury is still out until I get to the other side of this– but I have a feeling that there’s magic in the middle school years, and I’m looking forward to the journey ahead.